Thanks to what happened lately, I must close myself even more.
To close, to survive.
No more dreams, no more love(s) or lovers, no more whishes or whims.
Nothing.
Just work, teach, learn, cook, eat sleep and pray.
Like when I was 20 years old.
But at that time I hade my reasons... I wanted to dance with all my soul. I had a goal.
Now I'm doing it just 'cause I don't want to soffer more than this.
Ok, ok, the message is clear, my life spoke to me barely. I'm gonna do it, but in such a way that anybody can imagine.
I'm going to show my best smile, I'm gonna be nice... nice... I word that I hate deeply.
Yeah... it's nice!!
I know that many people will not understand, I know that all my friends will be sorry for this, but I'm angry, I'm furious, and it's just my fault, yes, I know... once again.
And yes... I'm going to hide myself, like an animal when is sick...
I'm not sick, thanks God, but my soul is wounded, my heart is broken, since a long time... almost two years, and now is the time to heal it.
Is the first time I'm alone doing it... and yes... I know... It's a challenge (like I didn't challenge myself enough lately... (a bitter smile).
And yes, I'm ready to kill if someone wants to touch my heart again and then leave me alone.
Please people, do not touch it just for your personal pleasure. Please.
I am arrogant, I'm opinionated, I'm selfish, I'm conceited, I'm cocky.
Yes... and I'm ready to kill. To unleash my fury.
In a little corner of my room I'm crying too much, in a little corner of my body something is screaming, in a little corner of my soul something wants to free its wings again.
But this is not the moment.
And yes... yes... I'm defenetly crazy.
Aren't you?
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